Comments on: 9/11 Bore

By: Harry

Harry — Tue, 16 Sep 2008 03:31:19 +0000

While the person is clearly a nuisance, there also seems to be a serious problem which requires help. As you have worked with this colleague for more than 7 years, who is therefore no stranger, perhaps you or someone else from the workplace can approach the organization for which your colleague’s loved one worked pre 9/11 and find out if they have a program to help those left behind or another suggestion along those lines.

By: Ollie

Ollie — Mon, 15 Sep 2008 19:26:11 +0000

In a work environment, this really painful problem should be raised with the person who supervises Frank’s colleague. As diplomatically as possible — because supervisors hate dealing with this kind of situation. Frank can do it alone, or can do it with others who feel like he does.

By: mike

mike — Mon, 15 Sep 2008 10:58:25 +0000

this is so sad

By: dani

dani — Mon, 15 Sep 2008 10:38:13 +0000

Maybe this is dumb but why don’t you suggest a big get together to discuss the dead person and the events surrounding the demise. Possibly your colleague needs closure doing it publicly and openly might help.

By: shelli

shelli — Mon, 15 Sep 2008 10:00:27 +0000

I had a friend like that. Her husband was killed in a pile-up caused by weather which got national publicity and the story was all over our local paper. I helped a lot. Listened to her for hours, had her and the kids over for meals, you name it. So did all her friends. Even when all of her old friends dropped her, I felt it my responsibility. Well guess what. When my dad died, she was too busy to call. Obviously, she worried that for about 5 minutes she would have to pay attention rather than giving it. That was that. She once yelled at someone who told a funny story about her late husband. She showed up at someone else’s home unannounced expecting star treatment because of her widowhood. You did what you could to help her get along with her life. If she can’t manage to, it’s her problem! Get along with yours.