http://www.thecheckoutline.org/advice/my-dying-mothers-will-is-an-outrage/ Advice for Dying and Death - When Sympathy Isnt Enough Fri, 18 May 2012 11:54:43 +0000 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.7 hourly 1 http://www.thecheckoutline.org/advice/my-dying-mothers-will-is-an-outrage/comment-page-1/#comment-214 Chippy Wed, 12 Nov 2008 16:59:02 +0000 http://www.thecheckoutline.org/wordpress/advice/my-dying-mothers-will-is-an-outrage/#comment-214 Here's an idea: Len tells mother he understands the issues and he too has a lot of concerns regarding his brother's health and his future. Wants to go to grad school and needs money. Asks to borrow from trust fund against iron-clad guarantees to repay. No loss to brother, gain to Len, mother relieved she can help both brothers. Simple, or what? Here’s an idea: Len tells mother he understands the issues and he too has a lot of concerns regarding his brother’s health and his future. Wants to go to grad school and needs money. Asks to borrow from trust fund against iron-clad guarantees to repay. No loss to brother, gain to Len, mother relieved she can help both brothers. Simple, or what?

]]> http://www.thecheckoutline.org/advice/my-dying-mothers-will-is-an-outrage/comment-page-1/#comment-213 Lucy Ann Wed, 12 Nov 2008 16:54:39 +0000 http://www.thecheckoutline.org/wordpress/advice/my-dying-mothers-will-is-an-outrage/#comment-213 Ziggy, you didn't read my comment and worse, ignored the subtext of Len's letter to Judy. The mother doesn't trust Len to do the right thing by his brother. Which is why she is creating a trust. Telling her that going to graduate school will enable him to better look after his brother by earning more is not likely to persuade her. She has made her judgement based not on his earning power but on his personality. Ziggy, you didn’t read my comment and worse, ignored the subtext of Len’s letter to Judy. The mother doesn’t trust Len to do the right thing by his brother. Which is why she is creating a trust. Telling her that going to graduate school will enable him to better look after his brother by earning more is not likely to persuade her. She has made her judgement based not on his earning power but on his personality.

]]> http://www.thecheckoutline.org/advice/my-dying-mothers-will-is-an-outrage/comment-page-1/#comment-211 Ziggy Wed, 12 Nov 2008 13:18:49 +0000 http://www.thecheckoutline.org/wordpress/advice/my-dying-mothers-will-is-an-outrage/#comment-211 If Len wants to go to graduate school and needs his mother's financial support, one way to raise this issue and make his mother feel better is to explain that by going to graduate school he will earn more. That way, he can tell her, he will take care of his Down Syndrome brother if he needs financial help in the future. Ziggy If Len wants to go to graduate school and needs his mother’s financial support, one way to raise this issue and make his mother feel better is to explain that by going to graduate school he will earn more. That way, he can tell her, he will take care of his Down Syndrome brother if he needs financial help in the future.
Ziggy

]]> http://www.thecheckoutline.org/advice/my-dying-mothers-will-is-an-outrage/comment-page-1/#comment-212 Lucy Ann Wed, 12 Nov 2008 11:22:22 +0000 http://www.thecheckoutline.org/wordpress/advice/my-dying-mothers-will-is-an-outrage/#comment-212 A mother knows her own kid better than anyone. She knows why she's asked Len to keep an eye on his brother, something he'd probably neglect to do ordinarily (or just do it by the numbers, if guilt sets in); that's obviously why she's not leaving him the money. Anyone who thinks a Down Syndrome adult 'is okay' should not be enturusted with that afflicted person's financial welfare. I truly hope she was smart enough to permit Len to manage the money. It's too bad she has to goi to her grave with two offspring like this, one who cannot care for himself and the other who can think of no one else A mother knows her own kid better than anyone. She knows why she’s asked Len to keep an eye on his brother, something he’d probably neglect to do ordinarily (or just do it by the numbers, if guilt sets in); that’s obviously why she’s not leaving him the money. Anyone who thinks a Down Syndrome adult ‘is okay’ should not be enturusted with that afflicted person’s financial welfare. I truly hope she was smart enough to permit Len to manage the money. It’s too bad she has to goi to her grave with two offspring like this, one who cannot care for himself and the other who can think of no one else

]]> http://www.thecheckoutline.org/advice/my-dying-mothers-will-is-an-outrage/comment-page-1/#comment-208 Mickey Wed, 12 Nov 2008 10:12:16 +0000 http://www.thecheckoutline.org/wordpress/advice/my-dying-mothers-will-is-an-outrage/#comment-208 Len's mother is a classic example of a guilt-filled parent with a problem child. By now the poor guy should be used to being punished for not having anything wrong with him. Children without disabilities also have legitimate needs, including money or attention. Too bad entire households revolve around problem children while neglecting the needs of regular ones. Len’s mother is a classic example of a guilt-filled parent with a problem child. By now the poor guy should be used to being punished for not having anything wrong with him. Children without disabilities also have legitimate needs, including money or attention. Too bad entire households revolve around problem children while neglecting the needs of regular ones.

]]> http://www.thecheckoutline.org/advice/my-dying-mothers-will-is-an-outrage/comment-page-1/#comment-210 Lanie Wed, 12 Nov 2008 10:07:51 +0000 http://www.thecheckoutline.org/wordpress/advice/my-dying-mothers-will-is-an-outrage/#comment-210 Your mother is wealthy. She's leaving the bulk to your brother. But so what? You're at least getting something, right? You're healthy, pretty young. Make do! Be grateful! Your mother is wealthy. She’s leaving the bulk to your brother. But so what? You’re at least getting something, right? You’re healthy, pretty young. Make do! Be grateful!

]]> http://www.thecheckoutline.org/advice/my-dying-mothers-will-is-an-outrage/comment-page-1/#comment-209 Kyle Wed, 12 Nov 2008 10:06:24 +0000 http://www.thecheckoutline.org/wordpress/advice/my-dying-mothers-will-is-an-outrage/#comment-209 I pity the poor man who will have such an insesnsitive and selfish person as yourself to keep an eye on him. I pity the poor man who will have such an insesnsitive and selfish person as yourself to keep an eye on him.

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