Dear Judy,
I have an uncle who died when he froze on the streets of New York. Yes, he was a junkie, and yes, I hardly knew him. I met him maybe three times, for all the obvious reasons.
The problem is my mother (his sister) never mentions him. She barely acknowledged him when he was alive. Now that he’s dead: nothing. Her sister, my aunt, never mentions him either. It’s as though he never existed.
It pisses me off. I am 18, but even I know you don’t just write somebody off just because you don’t like the way they lived.
Rick
Dear Rick,
I always say you can’t control the actions of other people (unless they’re your kids, and even then only up to the age of maybe 8). The only person you can completely control is you.
If you want to mention your late uncle, fine. He was your relative, you’re entitled.
Just don’t expect your mother or your aunt to follow suit. That way you won’t be disappointed.
Thank you for writing
Judy
