My initial reaction to home funerals, when I first heard about them was simple, direct, and pretty infantile: Yuck.
But over the last year, especially since I”ve been exposed to the horrifying practices of certain funeral directors, I’ve learned better. About the strongest and most compelling case for doing it yourself was made in this month’s issue of Smithsonian magazine. And it was made not by a crusader or an anti-funeral home ideologue but by Max Alexander, a beautiful writer.
In genial, eloquent language Alexander writes of 2 deaths, his father’s and his father-in-law’s, along with vivid passages on how he built a coffin.
”… my 15-year-old son Harper and I made a coffin out of plywood and deck screws from Home Depot. I know that sounds cheesy, but it was nice hardwood veneeer, and we applied veneer edging for a finished look. I could have followed any number of plans from the Internet, but in the end I decided to wing it with my own desing. We routed rabbet joints for a tight construction.
“‘I guess we wouldn’t want him falling out the bottom,’” Harper said.”
Total cost: $90.98
I’m not suggesting that’s the route everyone should go when a family member dies. But the article is so quiet and touching, such a nice way to think about what death means — and life – that it’s worth reading and remembering.
Here’s the link: http://www.smithsonianmag.com/arts-culture/Presence-of-Mind-Which-Way-Out.html
For me, this item has resulted in two reactons. The first is to look into finding someone with carpenter skills to help me (I’m all thumbs), design and then agree on the cost of a simple coffin.
The second is to consider subscribing to the Smithsonian Magazine. If they have this kind of wonderful articles, Ineed to get it regularly.
THanks again for your wonderful blog
martin
I have family in Mexico and they don’t use funeral homes very often. They view the body at the families’ homes. Friends and family call at the home and then they bury them in a homemade casket. I think it is more personal and intimate. My family also has some Indian heritage and my uncle has permission from the state of New Mexico to have an Indian burial. I think it is wonderful and I love the fact that my family has such a strong cultural background. Thanks for your article.