Post discusses task of writing an obituary, and gives a “non-PC” example that was actually published…

I don’t see much wrong with telling the truth about a person in their obituary, so long as that truth doesn’t harm anyone else. I had to write an obituary once; the deceased had a lot of faults and a lot of negativity surrounding his life and death. I didn’t go into all that detail or fault in his obit, but I didn’t lie about him either. I found a happy medium, because I and others loved him.

I say, don’t make up nice things to say about a dead person that aren’t true. But don’t hurt others with the truth, just for the sake of being hurtful.

It immediately reminds me of a time decades ago, when I was priviliged to attend a 50th wedding anniversary party, my first such experience.

During the time for toasts, one of the adult children get up and gave a lengthy and moving toast to his parents, complete with tears, in which he spoke about all the love and support he had always received from hs parents, and how they were always there for him, etc., etc.

I, as a child, was totally confused by this display of filial affection, since it had been my personal observation that the parents and their (now adult) children had always had a rocky relationship. One so difficlut that several of the children involved were in therapy, and those who weren’t should have been.

In fact, the younger generations were known for their dysfunctionality.

Later, I privately asked my mother why ALL THE LIES were told at the event, and she essentially explained to me that while no one present was fooled, teling these falacious tales was considered the proper thing to do at a social event like this.

My feeling, however would be that it’s better to say nothing at all than to either tell lies or embarrass people publicly with the truth.

I’d say that an obit like that might have a cleansing effect on the sole, but it ought not to be publicly published.

Just my two cents worth…

Galena