“Dear Judy, often you tell people, rightly, to write a will,” one reader writes. “But please emphasize it’s really important they do so if they have a complex estate, or a lot of relatives.”
Actually, here’s the most important person you should write a will for: You.
I know, I know. You’re not going to inherit anything from your own will. You won’t be around to enjoy the house or the cash or the jewelry.
But invariably when you start writing a will, you also make other provisions. Any lawyer you consult will, at the time of your visit, also push some other documents your way for you to sign. The most important of these?
The Durable Power of Attorney for Health Care — also known as a Living Will. This document will spell out exactly what you want — and don’t want — done in the event of the last stages of a terminal illness.
Now I know it’s natural for all of us to avoid dealing with such matters. But think hard. Who do you want making vital decisions for you when you’re too ill to make them yourself: some hospital bureaucrats? A doctor you’ve never laid on before? Or you?
Who’s best qualified to know what you want in the way of an easy death? Your adult children? Or some judge?
I realize that it’s entirely possible some of us — many of us — may never, even when we’re critically ill, have to confront end-of-life decisions. Nature may take its course, or we might die in our sleep. But I ask you also to consider that none of us can wholly choreograph our lives or our deaths. Unpleasant surprises, accidents, and mishaps can all occur.
So do yourself the biggest favor in the world. The next time you go over your will, determining who will inherit what from your estate, go over the other options as well. Think about exactly what you want to happen, what last gift you want to give to yourself.
