http://www.thecheckoutline.org The Advice Column for the Terminally Ill and Those Who Care About Them Mon, 06 Oct 2008 12:25:37 +0000 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.3.3 http://www.thecheckoutline.org/wordpress/advice/my-sister-the-crazy-lady/#comment-627 Solly Mon, 06 Oct 2008 11:23:59 +0000 http://www.thecheckoutline.org/wordpress/advice/my-sister-the-crazy-lady/#comment-627 She is buying hope. That is completely justifiable -- or at least as justifiable as paying for anything else. She is buying hope. That is completely justifiable — or at least as justifiable as paying for anything else.

]]> http://www.thecheckoutline.org/wordpress/advice/my-sister-the-crazy-lady/#comment-625 Quentin Mon, 06 Oct 2008 11:19:29 +0000 http://www.thecheckoutline.org/wordpress/advice/my-sister-the-crazy-lady/#comment-625 Entire billion dollar industries are based on people deluding themselves. Macrobiotics makes a lot more sense than anti-cellulite cream. Unless you or her husband objected to every other useless thing she ever bought (let's start with how many shoes a person actually needs or wears), you have no moral right to say a word. Sensible consumerism does not start when a person is dying. Entire billion dollar industries are based on people deluding themselves. Macrobiotics makes a lot more sense than anti-cellulite cream. Unless you or her husband objected to every other useless thing she ever bought (let’s start with how many shoes a person actually needs or wears), you have no moral right to say a word. Sensible consumerism does not start when a person is dying.

]]> http://www.thecheckoutline.org/wordpress/advice/do-i-have-to-tell-the-truth-about-my-dead-wife/#comment-623 Nadia Fri, 03 Oct 2008 14:55:15 +0000 http://www.thecheckoutline.org/wordpress/advice/do-i-have-to-tell-the-truth-about-my-dead-wife/#comment-623 Tom needs a ton of help. Right now I don't think he is fit to raise farm animals, much less children. Tom needs a ton of help. Right now I don’t think he is fit to raise farm animals, much less children.

]]> http://www.thecheckoutline.org/wordpress/advice/do-i-have-to-tell-the-truth-about-my-dead-wife/#comment-622 Otis Fri, 03 Oct 2008 14:54:06 +0000 http://www.thecheckoutline.org/wordpress/advice/do-i-have-to-tell-the-truth-about-my-dead-wife/#comment-622 You obviously have a lot of guilt. Don't even think about sharing it with your children. They've had enough in their lives: a sick mother and a philandering father. I think they've suffered enough. You obviously have a lot of guilt. Don’t even think about sharing it with your children. They’ve had enough in their lives: a sick mother and a philandering father. I think they’ve suffered enough.

]]> http://www.thecheckoutline.org/wordpress/advice/do-i-have-to-tell-the-truth-about-my-dead-wife/#comment-621 martin Fri, 03 Oct 2008 12:38:15 +0000 http://www.thecheckoutline.org/wordpress/advice/do-i-have-to-tell-the-truth-about-my-dead-wife/#comment-621 You owe it to your wife to have your kids think she was a wonderful woman. Telling them anything other than that is simply dealing with your own guilt. Defend her when others speak otherwise. Forget the nuances, just be a stand up guy for a change. Martin You owe it to your wife to have your kids think she was a wonderful woman. Telling them anything other than that is simply dealing with your own guilt. Defend her when others speak otherwise. Forget the nuances, just be a stand up guy for a change.
Martin

]]> http://www.thecheckoutline.org/wordpress/blog/how-to-know-when-its-time-to-switch-doctors/#comment-620 Nathan Thu, 02 Oct 2008 14:53:08 +0000 http://www.thecheckoutline.org/wordpress/blog/how-to-know-when-its-time-to-switch-doctors/#comment-620 Perhaps you should write a column about how and why doctors sometimes drop patients. I retired after 40 years -- and one day I just may write a book about patients and their families. It isn't always pretty. There is more than one side to this. Just because someone pays our fees (usually an insurance company) doesn't we're now the property of the patient. Perhaps you should write a column about how and why doctors sometimes drop patients. I retired after 40 years — and one day I just may write a book about patients and their families. It isn’t always pretty. There is more than one side to this. Just because someone pays our fees (usually an insurance company) doesn’t we’re now the property of the patient.

]]> http://www.thecheckoutline.org/wordpress/blog/how-to-know-when-its-time-to-switch-doctors/#comment-619 Kerri Thu, 02 Oct 2008 14:50:10 +0000 http://www.thecheckoutline.org/wordpress/blog/how-to-know-when-its-time-to-switch-doctors/#comment-619 Whenever I went to the doctor with my dad, who was terminal, the doctor would smile and inform me that I was just wasting my time. That my father is a responsible, intelligent human being and that he -- the doc -- would take excellent care of him, and essentially I should just butt out. After he repeated this not -so-subtle message during the course of three or four visits, I realized he preferred not to be bothered by a prying pesky relative. Dad agreed, and we switched doctors. Good decision! Whenever I went to the doctor with my dad, who was terminal, the doctor would smile and inform me that I was just wasting my time. That my father is a responsible, intelligent human being and that he — the doc — would take excellent care of him, and essentially I should just butt out. After he repeated this not -so-subtle message during the course of three or four visits, I realized he preferred not to be bothered by a prying pesky relative. Dad agreed, and we switched doctors. Good decision!

]]> http://www.thecheckoutline.org/wordpress/blog/how-to-know-when-its-time-to-switch-doctors/#comment-618 Kyle Thu, 02 Oct 2008 14:20:35 +0000 http://www.thecheckoutline.org/wordpress/blog/how-to-know-when-its-time-to-switch-doctors/#comment-618 2 other indicators: when the doctor says 'trust me on this one', and when he says 'this is too complicated to explain to a lay person'. 2 other indicators: when the doctor says ‘trust me on this one’, and when he says ‘this is too complicated to explain to a lay person’.

]]> http://www.thecheckoutline.org/wordpress/blog/how-to-know-when-its-time-to-switch-doctors/#comment-617 Peter Thu, 02 Oct 2008 14:18:44 +0000 http://www.thecheckoutline.org/wordpress/blog/how-to-know-when-its-time-to-switch-doctors/#comment-617 Do you know the difference between a doctor and God? God doesn't think he is a doctor.... Do you know the difference between a doctor and God? God doesn’t think he is a doctor….

]]> http://www.thecheckoutline.org/wordpress/advice/the-4000-diamond-earrings-should-have-been-left-to-me/#comment-616 Belinda Thu, 02 Oct 2008 13:23:45 +0000 http://www.thecheckoutline.org/wordpress/advice/the-4000-diamond-earrings-should-have-been-left-to-me/#comment-616 Unless the widower is very rich, do not either ask for or accept the earrings you once gave his wife -- as a gift, don't forget. It was his late wife -- your big friend -- who forked out whatever it cost to maintain you for a year, probably more than your gift. So on balance their joint account, which is now his, is in the red when it comes to you</del>. Unless the widower is very rich, do not either ask for or accept the earrings you once gave his wife — as a gift, don’t forget. It was his late wife — your big friend — who forked out whatever it cost to maintain you for a year, probably more than your gift. So on balance their joint account, which is now his, is in the red when it comes to you.

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