Dear Judy,
How do I balance helping my 83-year-old mother with breast cancer (I do not want to feel guilt after she dies) with the fact that in many ways I don’t like being with her? I don’t want her to live with me, but lately she’s been dropping hints about “mother-in-law apartments.”
I want to “be [...]
Dear Judy,
A few weeks ago my friend’s mother died of breast cancer. The mother was skeptical of Western medicine and refused chemo or radiation. My friend moved my mother into her one-bedroom apartment (my friend slept on the couch), and provided all her end-of-life care.
In the mother’s final days, my friend took her to the [...]
Dear Judy,
For the past 10 years I’ve had breast cancer (first one, then the other breast, and there’s been some metastasis even after the mastectomies). I think I’m not going to be okay forever, maybe not even next year. But for the moment, I’m holding steady with chemo.
I have no hair. I do wear a [...]
Dear Judy,
I saw your advice yesterday to the sister who didn’t want to visit a sibling with breast cancer because she, herself, feared illness and hospitals.
I am a nurse and I disagree with you totally: You told her to go visit, anway, and that is idiotic. People who are mortally afraid of illness can only [...]
Dear Judy,
My daughter died of breast cancer which spread everywhere. That was 3 years ago. There are 4 kids, my grandchildren, and the oldest is 12. It’s all very tragic, and I’m still not recovered really. Every time I see the eldest, who is beautiful with light brown hair, I see my own daughter’s face.
My even [...]
Dear Judy,
My sister and I haven’t spoken in years. We never got along, but when we were in our 20’s she did something so awful I can’t bring myself to mention it or I’ll be in tears. It had to do with my sexuality is all I’ll say.
Anyway, she’s just been diagnosed with breast cancer [...]
Dear Judy,
My sister who has breast cancer, as it turns out, was misdiagnosed over a period of five years.
She complained every year (sometimes twice a year) about her breast getting harder and harder. Anyhow, by the time the doctors found it, she had an 8.5 centimeter tumor, which took up almost all of her breast, [...]
Dear Judy,
My sister got a diagnosis of breast cancer when she was only 30. She had a mastectomy, some chemo. That was 10 years ago, and every checkup since has been fine.
So she’s lucky, right? Not according to her!
Every time something bad happens to anyone — and some very bad things have happened (we have [...]
Dear Judy,
Maybe this seems petty compared to some of the emails you get. But I go to the same gym every day at 8 AM — well every weekday anyway. And I always see almost all the same people every day, all of us getting pumped before we go off to work. And we always [...]
Dear Judy,
In all, 5 friends of mine have been diagnosed with breast cancer. One died. We are all in our 50’s. What do you think of the way our government task force guidelines swept the importance of early detection under the rug? They basically said Hey no worries, under 50 you definitely don’t need a mammogram, [...]
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Posted on January 24th, 2009